Allan: Well, Taylor Monroe is getting rattled pretty well right now, as Technician releases the arms, but applies a chinlock.
(Crowd boos as Ma Porter hops up on the ring apron)
Allan: What's this? I knew Ma Porter wouldn't be content just standing around ringside for very long.
Congo: The ref is arguing, threatening to send her backstage...and meanwhile, BJ Ross sneaks into the ring and stomps McMillen who is forced to release the chinlock. I love the classics, don't you Bishop?
Allan: I'm not sure that we'd agree what the classics are. Now Powerbomb has entered the fray and she's nailing BJ with body blows. BJ counters with a headbutt and Ma jumps down off the apron.
Congo: Meanwhile, Taylor has just nailed McMillen with a jawbreaker! The ref is trying to sort out just who is legal, and on the outside Ma is laughing at the Hyena Queens!
Allan: Taylor throws the Technician to the outside, so I guess the ref will have to settle for BJ and Basset being the legal women in the ring. Taylor delivers a few well-placed kicks to Powerbomb, but goes back to her corner.
Congo: And Ross has Angela in a choke! The ref, giving a warning...
Allan: And Ma Porter on the outside, "helps" Terry get back into the ring, but not before she gives her a vicious cheap shot to the throat!
(Crowd boos!!!!!)
Congo: BJ and Bassett now, battling for control as Angela gets to her feet. Ross slaps on a wristlock. The Blonde has the leverage advantage, but Bassett is so powerful...
Allan: She begins to turn it around, and Ross is...Ross with a yank of the hair, and Angela is flat on her back!
Congo: Baby Jane releases the wristlock and drops a forearm to the throat. She goes back to her corner and tags in Taylor.
Allan: Taylor enters the ring as Powerbomb struggles to get up, and Taylor...clips Angela's leg!!!
Congo: Now Taylor raises her arms in the air! Listen to this crowd boo! And Taylor lies down and applies a leg scissors!
SPUD: FIVE MINUTES HAVE ELAPSED. FIFTEEN MINUTES REMAIN!
Allan: She's trying to cut off the flow of blood to Powerbomb's brain.
Congo: She needn't bother, Bishop. Angela Bassett's brain probably runs on molasses.
Allan; In any case, Taylor is really applying that pressure. She's probably trying to sap Bassett's energy to be able to apply the team's finisher, the Suicide Stunner. Congo: And what would that make this leg scissors, then? The Suicide Squeeze?
Allan: Hey, the all-star game was last week. Bassett is really struggling to escape.
Allan: I think Technician is tired of wrestling this match according to the Blondes' rules! She grabs a chair from our Spanish announce table!
Congo: Hasta La Vista, Baby Jane!
(Crowd noise swells in anticipation!!)
Allan: No! Ma Porter is blocking Terry's way back to the ring, and there's no way the Technician is going through the big Mafioso!
Congo: McMillen throws the chair to one side, but has words with Porter as she hops backup on the apron. Powerbomb has reached the ropes with her foot, so the ref forced the break. Both women on their feet now, but Powerbomb is wobbly.
Allan: Taylor runs at Angela, but Angela sidesteps. Monroe, off the ropes, and into an armdrag takedown from Bassett. The Powerbomb, with a second wind!
Congo: Second, but last. Monroe is right back on her feet.
Allan: But Powerbomb with a *hard* standing dropkick! She's a little disoriented, but she's wandering in the right direction to make the tag.
Congo: But Ma Porter trips her from the outside!!!! Ventured a little too close to the side, and Ma took advantage! Now there's a great Mother-in-Law!
Allan: Don't say the word "Law" too loudly with her around!
Congo: Monroe follows up with an elbowdrop to the back of Bassett's head. And another. She backs into the far ropes...spinning heel kick!
Allan: Blocked by Bassett! Monroe crumples to the mat! The crowd is on its feet!
Congo: And Powerbomb makes the tag!!!
(Crowd pops *HARD*!!!)
Allan: Technician immediately climbs to the top rope and comes in with a...Hurricanrana!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Some aerials from the Technician!!!
Congo: And Terry is all over Taylor like white on rice, if you'll forgive the allusion. She picks up Monroe for an Irish whip. Monroe bounces off...back body drop!!!
SPUD: 10 MINUTES HAVE ELAPSED! TEN REMAIN!!
Congo: As we reach the halfway point, Terry McMillen is hustling
Taylor Monroe into unfriendly territory. She pounds Monroe's head into her corner's turnbuckle!
(The fans count: 1...2...3...4...5...6...7...8...9..10!!!)
Allan: Taylor's getting her bell rung in there, and now the ref is warning off McMillen. McMillen is arguing with him. And while his back is turned, Powerbomb is choking the life out of Taylor with that tag rope! Turnabout is fair play! Ma Porter is trying to get the ref to turn around!
Congo: And Powerbomb drops the rope just in time to avoid being caught! The Hyena Queens are downright ruthless opponents!
Allan: Now Terry tags in her partner, and Powerbomb enters the ring. She seems to have shaken out most of the cobwebs. Bassett, draping Monroe's neck on the top rope. She climbs to the other side of the ropes...and drops from the apron to the floor, snapping Monroe's head!
Congo; My word! A modified Stun Gun from Angela Bassett! Now Taylor...DEAR LORD!!!!
Allan: MA PORTER JUST BARRELLED INTO ANGELA BASSETT AND SENT HER HEAD FIRST INTO THE STEEL STEPS!!!!
(CROWD BOOS LIKE CRAZY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)
Allan: The Blondes better be disqualified for that!!!!
Congo; Get real, Bishop! This is a World Title match. The fans want it, you and I want it, all the wrestlers backstage want it. It would take something big for the ref to issue a DQ in this one.
Allan: But he's not gonna let Porter get away with that...he's kicking her out!!! Ma is trying to plead her case, but the Ref is telling her to leave ringside.
Congo: Now Ma is shouting and turning red as Terry checks on her partner! Security comes running down the aisle!!! This is too much, they better not get in Ma's way, or she'll squash 'em like bugs!
Allan: She threatens to hit a security guard, but I don't think she wants to spend the night in the slammer. Not that it would be the first time, I'm sure.
Congo: Cooler heads had better prevail as Terry enters the ring to take on BJ Ross. Speaking of cool, here comes the coldest heart in the business!!
(Fans boo ***INCREDIBLY*** loud as Nikita Marx jogs down to ringside)
Allan: And Nikita is getting in between Ma and these guards. Brave woman! And Ma seems to have cooled down; Nikita is leading her backstage
(Fans continue to boo as Ma heads backstage, glaring at ringside fans)
Congo: That leaves just Terry and Angela against BJ and Taylor. Right now, BJ and McMillen are locking up: I'm sure neither one is legal right now, but the ref certainly had his hands full dealing with Ma Porter.
Allan: Powerbomb is still struggling to get to her feet. The damage has been done. Baby Jane, with a kneelift to Terry's stomach. And another. Now a slap to McMillen's face.
SPUD: FIFTEEN MINUTES HAVE ELAPSED!! FIVE REMAIN!!
Congo: BJ bounces off the far ropes and connects with a flying forearm!!! Now BJ is signaling for Taylor to go to the top rope.
Allan: What's this gonna be? BJ picks up Terry and executes backbreaker with her knee! THIS IS GONNA BE THE HYENA'S FINISHER, THE BIG THROWDOWN!!!!
(Crowd is screaming!!)
Congo: But Powerbomb grabs that chair that McMillen threw aside earlier!! She's into the ring!! Taylor is perched on high!!!
Allan: ANGELA BASSETT JUST SLAMMED THAT CHAIR ACROSS THE BACK OF BJ'S HEAD!!!!!! NOW BASSETT FORCES THE CHAIR INTO MONROE'S STOMACH!!! MONROE FALLS TO THE OUTSIDE!!!!
(Crowd heat ^intensifies^!!!!)
Congo: The ref is calling for the bell!!
****DING**** ****DING**** ****DING****
SPUD: LADIES AND GENTLEMAN, THE WINNERS OF THE MATCH VIA DISQUALFICATION, AT A TIME OF 16:13, THE SUICIDE BLONDES!!!!!!!!!!!!
(Fans boo and throw a ton of garbage as "My Way" by Sid Vicious blasts over the PA.)
Congo: The Queen's, exercising their champion's prerogative to save their belts by taking a disqualification, but that's always a coward's way out.
Allan: Hey, the Blondes showed more than their fair share of cowardice, even though it was a hard fought match.
Congo: Well, who wouldn't be afraid of The Hyena Queens? They look like Mack Trucks, for heaven's sake!
Allan: Never at a loss f or an insult, are you, Paul?
(Sam Mutt heads back down the aisle with a Coors in his hand as Congo Paul gets up to leave.)
Mutt: Great beer...okay! Let's do this!
Bishop: You two have the easiest jobs.
Mutt: No, Dalbello Rage has the easiest job. (Laughs!) She won't last 10 minutes against Angela Bassett.
Bishop: Fans, this feud has FINALLY come to a head. With Dalbello's retirement, once and for all the feud between the MISFITS and Hyena Queens may finally be put to rest.....
Mutt: After she jobs to Angela.
Spud: Wrestling Fans, our next contest tonight is scheduled for one fall with a 15 minute time limit. It is a special CAPTAIN's match!
Bishop: Fans, this is our first Captains match in the GDWA. A Captains match is a singles contests pitting members of tag teams against each other...
Mutt: And what a match it is! Dalbello Rage saying Sayonara to America for greener pastures in Japan.
Spud: First...
(Mixed cheers as fans hear the "cryptic tune of the WU-TANG Clan’s "SECOND COMING".)